Thursday, July 01, 2004

U.S.: The aftermath

All my bones hurt, especially my shoulder which has been acting up since I resumed bike riding recently. Don't ask me what one has to do with the other. I dunno.

Instead of laying tile today, I wound up laying an oak floor.

It doesn't matter how much you exercise. It doesn't matter if you can do the turtle (bend over backwards and rest your hands on the ground). It doesn't matter if you bike, skip rope, stretch, twist, or anything. When you lay a floor, you discover that your lower back has muscles you never knew were there. You realize that doing sets of squats aren't worth squat cuz whatever you call your thigh muscles still hurt.

Then, you make the mistake of driving about an hour to get home and, upon arriving, find out that hmmm, getting out of the vehicle is not as easy as it's supposed to be. Climbing the steps is not a quick trot up to your door. Now you know how an 85-year old feels.

So. What's the solution? A bath, a tube of Theragesic, a pack of double stuf Oreos, a six-pack of beer, with two well chilled in the deep freeze, a gallon of water to offset the effects of the beer, and a bed.

All I can say is, let no one ask you to move. Tomorrow morning, oy vey!, is time enough.

As for the fish broth watch ... not tonight, Josephine.


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